A lesson in surrender

 

Last week we had lots of thunderstorms and lightning.. it was my training day to swim in the openwater…

 

So my coach and team went to the beautiful crystal lake in Connecticut…. it was a far trip for me

 

I started off my drive to the lake with many doubts…. and frustrations… it was a long drive, the weather was horrible and dubious at best with torrential downpours and flashes of nature’s swift sword

 

We got to the lake and parked on the side of the road.. 4 cars with 5 atheletes in slashing rain… this was dumb I thought… I kept texting my coach.. that this was a bad idea and we should just forget it..

 

He was quite confident that the Storm would end.. he was right… we checked the radar map and indeed it was going to dissipate… except there was another storm arriving an hour later…

We had an 1 h ish window to swim

 

We got out of the cars in the drizzle and made our way to the lake…. got into the wetsuits and off we swam….one end of the lake to the other…

 

On arrival to the other end.. we heard thunder…. ugh.. it’s going to be a fast swim back.. aye.. yes it was….

 

But here is what happened…somewhere after 1600 yards I could see the shoreline and I stopped… I floated and asked my myself why the f I as doing all this?

 

I unloaded a list of doubts, fears, and judgments about my life… especially pertaining to all this training (totally normal I guess)

 

I mean I am not an athelete am I? I am always slower than everyone else? What was the point of doing all this? What am i trying to prove to myself? This can’t be my destiny doing all this swimming running and biking? I am Cardiologist damn it what am I doing this stuff in my spare time…. this is not me…I have other things to do.. ( it went on and on)

 

Then I closed my eyes and let it all go… I asked for guidance from the universe… I surrendered…. it was not that I don’t know…. but I do know the course of my life and my whys. I do know how to take responsibility of my duty and accountability for my actions.

 

I offered my life and all.my experiences to the universe, God, Source, the mind of intention and creation… and let go and opened my eyes..

 

There it was …..not one but 2 🌈 rainbows..

 

It was a confirmation of all that I am and all that I do..

 

My divine task is to inspire and heal…

 

So roll up my sleeves and do what i have been sent to do…. with every tool and gift i have learned…. those were my instructions in this experience…

 

Got it. Read you loud and clear universe.. ready to take it into action

 

My insight here was I would have missed this connection… this communication with the universe had i stayed in the car or drove home… there was somehow something I had to experience in the water that day…see the double rainbow…feel the renewed magic within my DNA and the energy in my bones..

 

I don’t know exactly how things will turn out…or what shape they will be…I have a pretty good idea… the rest is a matter of surrendering to the divine…trust that I am just an instrument to be played by the sacred music of source

 

To be the hand of divinity is one of the greatest gifts of every being.. we each are the hand to orchestrate miracles…..but do we trust ourselves to BE that hand….do we surrender to God ( the Grand Organized Design) to use us per its divine will ?

 

And so begins humanity’s most potent journey each day…surrender

…………..

I love you