It is great to be advertising successes yet how often do we advertise our failures. Why don’t we ?
Perhaps because it is out of a need to be loved from external sources, and so the fear comes up of what will happen if those who adore us, see our failures, will they withdraw their affection? Will they shun us? Will we shun them for our shame?
I have had many failures in my life. Big ones, small ones, and some gargantuan failures. I have hidden my failures from people for all the reasons I mentioned above. Yet over the last few years I have come to a new sense of balance and epicenter with myself.
When we have failures many questions arise. The biggest question in all of this is that of whether we judge ourselves for our failures? Yes of course we do. Then in that case Will we love ourselves despite the failures? Will we dare to step out of the house for others to see us in our moments of shame? And in doing so allow ourselves to be seen?
This steps into the uncomfortable nature of feeling vulnerable. When this happens I find that I am hard pressed to ” feel good ” and so do not like that feeling of “not feeling good” and try to hide and escape. Yet facing the failures or fears in that moment is the single most valiant thing to do.
Own it.
Yes i failed.
Yes I am afraid.
And I don’t care if the world sees me vulnerable or afraid.
Because in these failures and fears I find the strength to move on with my life, and find solutions to these failures. Find fortudide in these fears.
Fears are nothing but reactions of the mind and body to situations that were unexpected. A reaction to an imagined state. Fears are beneficial as they act as guides towards a better understanding of what is transpiring in reality if we look beyond the fear.
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I love you