Perfectionist procrastinator

I am a perfectionist and a procrastinator which means that I am going be awesome some day !

These are 2 of my biggest “problems” that I face. I suspect we all do on some level. Each of these have peculiar roots. When I am trying to be a perfectionist, it is because I am comparing myself to some other standard based on an outward injection of someone else’s values or a collective ideal. This means I am not being authentic to myself as I continue to safe harbor in a fantasy of the ideal.

As a procrastinator I am not living my life by my highest purpose, so I postpone experiences or events that may be important or not fulfilling that which may require to be done in the hopes of a fantasy life. Again not staying integral to myself.

When I play out the role of the procrastinating perfectionist, I find that I am not giving myself permission to be myself. The version of me with all its imperfections today. This can certainly become a curse for me as I struggle each day not living life fully and hoping that one day I will be able to live my life to the gold standard of perfection based on an outward ideal.

So I plan to change this mindset. I am an imperfect human each day. I own it. I break the illusion of my fantasy that I create in my imminent mind. Yet I am also awesome in each moment. I have the potential for striving towards something great not tomorrow but today, but if I do not get it, I will try again tomorrow and not hate myself today.

I give myself permission to be ME. The authentic version, aligned to my highest purpose of BEing.

………………….

I love you

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